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12/16/19: THANKS FOR ALL OF THE FISH HEADS W/ BILL MUMY

Posted on December 16th, 2019 by Clyde Lewis

MONOLOGUE WRITTEN BY CLYDE LEWIS

The traditions of Christmas were very much part of a spiritual movement to remember the humble birth of Jesus. It is also well-known that many of the traditional pagan celebrations center on ghosts, monsters, and demons that would show at the year’s darkest times.

Charles Dickens the author of “A Christmas Carol” always added an element of the paranormal to convey a lesson — his four ghosts that appear to Ebenezer Scrooge are very aggressive and torment him in the nights prior to Christmas day. Marley was a frightening specter that looked hideous and inhuman.

The Ghost of Christmas Present appears and just prior to the arrival of the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come, he lifts his heavy cloak and reveals two emaciated children with hollowed-out black eyes. He calls the boy, Ignorance and the girl, Want.

On the forehead of the boy was a mark. The mark meant doom.

It was a prelude to the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come – the ghost of the future, draped and hooded was also the Ghost of Christmas Past.

The last Christmas, that is if Scrooge did not change his miserly old ways.

It was certainly a horror story with a reminder that the season should be recognized for both its lighter side and darker side.

In the times of Dickens, it was hard to see a good side of Christmas when all things were horrific in his day from children starving to poverty. The hooded figure of Christmas yet to come had a very paranormal background.

In the late 19th and early 20th centuries, legends would persist that the hooded figure would sometimes appear at Christmas Eve mass and if you were touched by his cloak you would die within the year. There were many historians that would write in their journals that the L’ankou would appear after the appearances of comets and fireballs.

If anyone was to see a hooded figure in their town, their town would be cursed with plague and dysentery. Dickens used this figure to represent the future because death was inevitable in times of greed and ignorance.

The hooded figure of Christmas yet to come was a threatening spirit that said nothing but threw Scrooge from shadow after shadow of the future, keeping him in horror and torment until he showed him what he would become dead and forgotten.

Carl Jung had expressed that all humans have inherited a set of primordial images that are buried deep in the collective unconscious. These are called “Archetypes” and they tend to remain buried within the unconscious mind. Deep down we respond to them and they are programmed into us through religion, art, literature, and films. The shadow archetype is the most dangerous one of all. Shadow archetypes have a tendency to invade thoughts and when those shadowy thoughts become “groupthink” there is the possibility that through some quantum trick a manifestation can take place.

The darkest parts of the year were somehow assuaged by Christmas but most Puritan and pious Christians hated Christmas because of the scary and paranormal stories that were spawned from gatherings around the hearth.undefined

It was the Christian churches that frowned on Christmas, the outlawed the legend of Krampus, they would forbid Christmas parties, Christmas trees, and Santa was forced into being a doppelganger for an old Catholic saint named Nicholas.

Believe it or not, Christmas celebrations in the United States are relatively new – meaning that most of the celebrations were forbidden here as well.

Like it or not, the Christmas celebrations are well rooted in pagan ritual and while Christians celebrate the birth of Christ and demand that he is the reason for the season, the truth is that the Christmas festivities we observe now are a result of a country-wide depression after the Civil War.

By the early 1800s, legends brought from Europe of Santa Claus and his protective nature of children and families were emphasized along with the celebration of Christ’s good deeds and events in his life. Alabama was the first state to legalize Christmas in 1836. Boston, Massachusetts legalized Christmas in 1856. It was illegal to recognize Christmas in the state of Oklahoma until a law was passed lifting the ban in 1907, which was 110 years ago.

Santaundefineds modern design was created in the late 1800s by American artist Thomas Nast, in a collection of sketches for Harperundefineds magazine. In the 1930s good old Coca Cola popularized his distinctive red-and-white costume and he became the western emblem of festive cheer. But, eighty years later, that archetype is under threat.

H.R. Departments are banning him from office Christmas parties citing religious reasons.undefined There is also the cringe-worthy Public Service announcement that was issued back in 2013 that showed a tired Santa canceling Christmas because of Global warming.undefinedundefined

The video features a disheveled Santa that looks more like Fidel Castro in a dimly-lit room. There is a flashlight on this Santa that looks menacing, telling children that because of “global warming” he is going to have to cancel Christmas. In the background, you can hear the dripping of water indicating that the North Pole is melting and that Santa and his elves may face the same fate of the so-called drowning polar bears.

Santa looks into the camera and says grimly:

“Regrettably I bring bad tidings. For some time now, melting ice of the North Pole has made our operations and our day-to-day life intolerable and impossible, and there may be no alternative but to cancel Christmas.”

Santa then scares everyone with his final warning that stockings may never be filled again “forevermore.”

If you have never seen it – it is worth a peek as it puts Santa in this grim world of melting snow –eliminating any and all Christmas cheer.

There have also been other bad examples of trying to remove Santa from the equation. In Australia, they are trying to eliminate Santa and replacing him with the “sustainability pirate” literally a pirate that sends the message of Climate activism.

It seems the battle for a non-binary Christmas icon is gathering steam. According to a new 2019 US poll by GraphicSprings, 27 percent recently of those polled said that Santa should be rebranded as a woke-tastic female or should be gender-neutral.

Disney wants in, too; its latest Christmas comedy film undefinedNoelleundefined (which didnundefinedt make it to theaters but was shown on Disney+) has Anna Kendrick stepping into Santaundefineds shoes. Rotten Tomatoes states undefinedThe always-charming Anna Kendrick does her best, but Noelleundefineds progressive take on a timeless tale is unfortunately subdued.undefined

undefinedThe First Temptation of Christundefined — a Netflix Christmas comedy special that portrays a gay Jesus and a weed-smoking Maryundefinedcertainly has people outraged.

More than 1.8 million people have signed the petition that calls for the special to be prohibited and pulled from Netflix.

People are feeling icky about such sacrilege – but a lot of people are defending the moves believe it or not.

How can anyone see any of this as normal? It could be the new normal – but certainly isn’t traditional and paints a dark picture of Christmases yet to come.

I know that when we are kids we always see Christmas as the best time of the year…and the young at heart still see Christmas as something wonderful.undefined I contend that it is wonderful if you are around kids.undefined However, beyond that Christmas is a time of some very weird experiences whether they are paranormal or abnormal.

For most people, Christmas is lauded as the time of year for spreading joy and spending time with family and friends, but unfortunately, not everyone feels an overwhelming sense of joy when December 25th comes around.

Let’s face it, families have issues, and those issues don’t stop just because Old Saint Nick is on his way. In fact,undefinedthe holidays tend to bring out the crazy in us from time to time.

The crazy of course is a matter or experience –whether you get a really weird Christmas gift or have an odd experience at Christmas that goes down as either super bizarre or overwhelmingly paranormal.

Recently I threw a Krampus part at a local bar in Portland Oregon. Every year the party has been packed – this year however we had a dismal turnout.undefined I was able to break away and have German food with my wife.undefined A man interrupted us and I, of course, said hello and kindly told him that I was eating dinner with my wife. He seemed a bit anxious and then showed me some papers. I was a little worried because last time this happened a very old man handed me papers telling me he was an angel sent to me by God to tell me that I needed to repent and turn my show over to Christ and his message at Christmas.. It seemed like I was in some Twilights Zone it’s a wonderful life moment.

But this time the man was sincere.undefined

He had an accent and told me that he had a visit from Krampus when he was a kid and said that when he showed up at Christmas party when he was a child Krampus came and took two children away.

He wrote his account on paper and wanted to give it to me.undefined I said to him that the bar wants me to tell a Krampus story and I would love to have him tell his story at the party.

By the time I finished my meal – the man had left and he even didn’t leave his story behind.. I really wanted to hear it.

It got me to thinking that many people have had some of those rare Christmas moments where they have experienced a miracle, or something scary, synchronistic, or even paranormal.

People have on occasion have told me that they have seen Santa Claus – and that it was very real to them—or that they have seen an angel or some other weird moment that they could not explain.

I have had several of course.

First off when I was a child there was a time where I knew my brother and sister would not be having a visit from Santa due to the fact that my father was laid up due to an automobile accident, my mother was sick and I had stepped on some glass and punctured my foot.

I recall that I was 14 at the time –and I wanted to help to get presents for my brother and sister – we were broke because my father couldn’t work and I was always curious how needy families were selected as being needy enough for toys for tots.

Christmas Eve came and we had no presents. We had a tree – and nothing else.

It was a foggy night and there was a knock at the door. I hobbled on my crutches to the door in my robe and underwear. I opened it and standing there was this very tall man in a Santa suit.undefined

He had a beard and he wore Buddy Holly style glasses. He had cowboy boots and a huge belt with a rodeo belt buckle.undefined He said with a deep southern accent, “Howdy ah am Santa Claus – ah came from the North Paul with this sack of presents for ya’ll want ‘em.

I looked to see if he arrived in a car – there was no car in the driveway and I said hesitantly – sure come on in.undefined He said “Nah – I got the reindeer up top, had to make a special stop hear cuz I hear y’all aren’t feelinundefined well.

I said that is right—I asked what charity he was with and he said: No charity, no foolin’ I am old St. Nick and I have this sack.”undefined He then pulled it in over our snow-covered porch and put it in our house.

I watched him leave through the window–and his tall hulking body crept into the fog – no one picked him up in a car – there was no truck.undefined It was if he just disappeared.

There was a time where I actually believed he was the real deal – no one ever came forward to tell us that they helped. I did not know the guy and the Texas accident was unreal.

This year what is most interesting is that on occasion I have been receiving reports of sightings of what are being called light beings.

People are calling them angels and they may lookundefinedlike an angel to some but I see them as typical spirit beings that show up in photos from time to time that resemble an orb or a mist; either way, they are compelling paranormal events when seen.

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Of course, beyond the paranormal, there are moments where Christmas actually sucks because of the fact that someone likes to overwork the cliché of “it’s the thought that counts.”

When someone says “Well it’s the thought that counts”undefined or “You shouldn’t have” – they are really saying that your gift sucks.

I have received horrible gifts in the past but the worst was when a radio station I worked for gave us all trips for the Holidays – the corporate guys knew what to give for Christmas they had a windfall year and everyone was happy. So was I – it was so exciting because I got a trip to Orlando. Meanwhile, there were also name we drew for office personnel where we had to buy gifts for someone. Apparently those on the sales team knew that the head honchos were giving away trips, so the gift was all travel oriented. Some got suitcases, gym bags, someone got Disney shirts. It was cool to see the reaction from people getting their gifts.

The guy who drew my name didn’t know me and I had seen him around the office. I was the overnight Deejay at the time so I rarely had a chance to talk.

He handed me an envelope.undefined I was thinking that maybe he was handing me passes to Disney World, or Bush Gardens in Tampa –or maybe even cash.

He said Merry Christmas—I didn’t know what to get you because I really don’t know much about you.

I then realized that maybe he was just getting me a card.

But it wasn’t

It was a piece of paper and on it said: “I contributed $100 dollars to St. Jude’s Hospital in your name.”

I felt bad because I hated the gift – and guilty because I loved the charity.

I thought it was a passive-aggressive gift – I was so pissed.undefined At least I went to Orlando with my wife – we did get to Disneyworld and on the monorail, we both decided we wanted a divorce.

Gifts can be overly practical to functionally useless to downright bizarre, and yet they are still gifted and re-gifted and sometimes people forget that you have given them something and they re-gift it back to you.

The holiday season is popularly well known for its excessiveness. At no other time of the year is so much effort and money spent in the purchasing process, with gifts bought for many people and with children and loved ones often receiving multiple offerings. Stores are at their busiest, with many products enjoying a vast bulk of their annual sales during this season.

December sales account for 40% of annual sales of toys for urban department stores, 28% of candy, 25% of cosmetics, 20% of tobacco and liquor, and 25% or more of annual sales of drugs, toiletries, stationery, greeting cards, books, and art. Advertising activity for many products also peaks for the Christmas season. Watches, cameras, and health and beauty aids are among the categories often spending 50% or more of annual budgets during this selling season.

I always think that if I buy something for someone, it would be something that I would want or at least I try to get what they would want instead of what is available like when you bring a gift for someone and they don’t have anything for you so they immediately throw together a candy plate.

That is fine but really, if I buy a gift and give it away, I don’t expect anything in return.

I just want to see the look on their faces when I give it and that is enough for me.

https://soundcloud.com/groundzeromedia/thanks-for-all-the-fish-heads-w-bill-mumy-december-16-2019

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